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Unfathomable Love (A love poem)


Your love blows my mind
How could it be? 
That You died on a Roman Cross
Just so that I can run free? 

Was this the only way
That You could get my attention? 
I didn't deserve it;
How could I have caused You so much tention? 

I will never understand why You had to die, 
Never figured out the cost; 
I am a sinner, undeserving
Just another sheep that was lost! 

"What can I do to show you My love is real?" 
That's what You whisper in my ear. 
That still, small voice
Quiet enough, but yet still so clear. 

"I would do it all over again, every wound, every scar
The nails, the blood, all for love, remember that I am not far! 

This is a love that you will never understand
Until one day, My child, you will touch My nail scarred hand.

Stay strong, know that I am real
Come to Me and pray, I promise you, you will heal. 

All the suffering may seem like too much to bare, 
Trust Me, My bride, the love that we have is very rare! 

'This too shall pass', a lot of people say
I promise I will be here, just come to Me and pray!"








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Prayer...How serious is it anyways?

Do you pray? Now be honest with yourself. If so, how often? When you need something from God, like a Genie with 3 magical wishes? Or do you pray in thanksgiving to the Lord? Do you only pray in church or is this something you only do in your quiet time, on your knees in your room while no one is watching you? Do you pray when you're in your car in the middle of worship music or when you almost got in that head-on collision in you car cause you were texting while driving and scream out "Thank you G-O-D for saving me!!" Whatever the case, you need to realize how important prayer really is. It is like the glue that holds this relationship with God all together.

Over and over again, God mentions prayer in the Bible. In-fact, He even modeled it for us and showed us how to pray  to Him in Matthew 6:9-10. Do we listen? What's stopping us from being a true prayer warrior? Is it time? Do we feel dumb when we pray? Are you the kind of person who quietly prays to yourself but when it comes to praying in front of people, in a public setting, there is just NO WAY?! We must be men and women of prayer in a world that is in such desperation.

If you're anything like me, you get so easily distracted when it comes to focusing on one thing and praying is one of them. I can start off wanting to pray for one thing in particular and end up on some crazy tangent praying for all sorts of stuff and forget the true reason I was praying in the first place. Yikes! It must start with structure. Pray with purpose and with power. The Bible tells us to pray to the Lord as if He has already grated us our request(s). He is our God after all and wants the very best for us as His children. We are Heirs with Christ, light-bearers and vessels for His kingdom so pray with authority!!

Don't be scared or intimated, just get on your knees, right now, and just pray!!
He is listening, He always is!!



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A sheep that had gone astray...


It's been quiet a while since I last wrote anything on here but I figured, today is a new day and it's time!! :)

Life in the last year has been an emotional roller-coaster, with ups, down, twist and turns. Nothing in my life is ever as it seems and always has surprises and things up it's sleeve, LOL.
(Yes, that rhymed, ha ha!)

This past week has really reflected on God..Not only on how amazing He really is, but more on His unfailing, incomparable, unfathomable GRACE! As I have reflected on His Grace this week, I've learned a whole lot.. Mainly that Grace is God's unmerited favor for us, His crazy love, if you will. I once heard at Harvest Christian Fellowship (Pastor Greg Laurie's church) that "GRACE" stood for "God's Riches At Christ's Expense." I couldn't think of a better way to put it...

When I think about God granting me Grace, more and more I realize my worth.
A.) I am favored so highly in the eyes of my King, even if I don't see it in myself sometimes.
B.) It is not something I can earn by being "good enough" or Perfect
C.) In knowing what Christ did for me on the cross to Calvary, I am grateful that I am forgiven of all of my transgressions.
I don't know how God can forgive a sinner like me, after all I've done. He is my Heavenly Father and I know that because of His sovereignty and Grace, I am forgiven and He no longer looks at my past but only at my future. All of my past sins are washed away, the Bible teaches that I am a new creation! Woo-Hoo!!! :)


This past week, I found a dog toy that belonged to Koda and it was a little tiny pet sheep. I didn't think anything of it till I found it outside, on the cement, dirty and gross. For some reason, the Lord used that to remind me of Him. Mind-blowing how He can use anything on this Earth to knock some sense into us and show us that He's ALWAYS there! It reminded me of a few Bible scriptures, the main one in the book of Revelation when John talks about seeing Jesus in the form of a lamb as if it were sent to the slaughter in the form of a Lion..The Lion of Judah, my precious Lord. What a beautiful description and reminder of what the Lord did when He was beaten beyond recognition at the cross. Father, thank You! :)

My goal this week is to put Him on full display and not be ashamed of Him or what He is doing in my life. I don't always understand why He does what He does, why people come and go in my life, opportunities arise and then blow away like the wind, BUT I do know one thing... My Lord is my Master and King and wins in the end!! I need to trust Him with everything that I've got in me. <3 You are in control!!

I have a super busy week in from of me, Chiropractor appointments, working out (Lord willing), Work, Bible Studies, prayer tours in West Los Angeles, and my quiet time with the Lord.

This weekend was absolutely amazing! I went to the "Women's connect event" @ Reality LA. I had an amazing time hearing from Reality LA women like Isabelle Smith (Pastor Lorenzo's amazing wife) and Brie Savard (Robert Naughton's fiancee), both gifted and beautiful women of God. :) I was so blessed to be a part of this event.


Heavenly Father, I praise You for all that You have done in my life, from birth until now! There's no way I can ever repay you, but just by obeying Your commandments for my life, trusting in You and all that You will for my life is, I pray that this is enough. I am so thankful and grateful for Your love, a love I will never truly understand, this side of Heaven. You are my Master and I pray that You reveal Your will for my life, in Your perfect timing. I will follow Your footsteps, follow Your way and place my life in Your hands. I'm trusting You're the way King. Thank You for calling me out of darkness and into Your beautiful light. I give You all of the honor and glory, In the name of Jesus, Your sons holy and precious name, I pray. Amen. <3

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Surprises around every corner corner (literally)

Um... As I write this, I'm STILL in shock from the crazy, unexpected day I have had. I'm in disbelief and yet am still alive to talk about it. I titled today's blog "Surprises around every corner (literally)" and that title couldn't ring more true...! =)

So today is Tuesday, July 6, 2010....probably (well heck, absolutely) a day I will ALWAYS remember!! It was a normal day, worked in the afternoon, then tried to work this evening but was unsuccessful, and in Hein sight, extremely happy I didn't!
I decided to kill sometime by hanging out in LA rather then sit in 2 1/2 hours of rush hour traffic on the way home today, and boy am I ecstatic that I did! I went to the Grove, outdoor mall and the Farmers Market in Los Angeles. It was very relaxing and a gorgeous day out so why not. I parked and walked out of my car and made my first stop at the Farmers Market to check it out since I've never been there before. I was walking while texting so I'd say I was pretty distracted but as I was walking down one of the aisle ways, I heard a familiar voice out of the blew and to my utter amazement as I look up from my phone, I turn around to see where the voice was coming from and it was no other then A.J. McLean from the Backstreet Boys...


Ok, in order to get the nostalgia from this story as I'm hoping to accomplish here, let's take a little trip down memory lane...
FLASHBACK to the year 1997...

I'm just a cute naive little 12 year old in middle school when this hot new band emerges on the scene..they call themselves "The Backstreet Boys," or BSB for short. The group includes 5 young attractive guys.. Brian Littrell, Howie Dorough, Nick Carter, Kevin Richardson and A.J. McLean. They are a hot new boy band much like New Kids on the Block, only better and more handsome. I was a HUGE fan when their first album came out (I even had it on audio cassette back in the day)
So...long story short, 13 years later...I am now 25, and STILL a fan! Pathetic, I know..but I can't help it. They are extremely gifted guys with amazing voices and big hearts! AND they are still together, (unlike any other boy band out there, HA!) still recording new albums in the studio and continuing to be a hit!
Okay, so back to my story now that you have a little bit of background on my long 13 year obsession.. I was pretty nervous, scared, anxious, practically having a panic attack from the shock of being 5 feet away from him in the flesh! :) I finally had the guts to go up to him and Rochelle (his gorgeous fiance.) I saw him head back to his table with a tray and drinks for their lunch and when he got back to the table, I went for it!! ...Here's how what I said...
"I thought that was you guys! I don't mean to interrupt, but I just wanted to introduce myself and say hi. I went to your concert, and you were amazing!"
He said thank you very much!
"Congratulation on the engagement by the way! (They both said thank you!)
When's the big day? <---asked class="goog-spellcheck-word" span="" style="background-color: yellow; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">rochelle
..="" data-blogger-escaped-span="">
She said, "Next May."
Wow, that's awesome, congrats! Well I don't want to take up more of your time but it was nice meeting you."
He said, "No problem, take care and have a good night!"
I said, "Thanks again, take care!"
That's it... 13 years later and it came down to this.. 60 second of conversation and an amazing experience I will NEVER forget!! Woo-hoo!!! :)
***UPDATE:***
That's right, there's more...believe it or not!!
October 20th was the second encounter...
He was in my restaurant!! Can't believe it but it happened..again! He was super casual, in a business meeting with William Morris Talent Agency. Super nice, and amazed that he came into my job. WOW... I have the best luck ever!! :)
Happy days, happy days! ;)

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A day of "Discovery"


"Be still, and know that I am God" (Psalm 46:10)

That was my lesson for the day!...

God is good, God is perfect, God is ALL knowing, God is everywhere (Omnipresent), God's will is perfect (Omnipotent), God knows all; sees all; hears all (Omniscient), He knows the desires of our hearts (1 Chronicles 28:9), God protects, God's timing and Will are in His hands and most of all, God loves us with everything He is! AMEN!

Today was a day that started off quite tough. My morning started by getting up early (7:00 am)..(HEY, that's early for me!) and heading to work. :/ We had a store meeting at 9 am for a food training class on the new items we are now offering as well as items that will be discontinued. An hour and 30 minutes later, it was FINALLY over! We learned a ton as it was a very productive meeting.

Immediately following the meeting, Morgan and I (Co-worker of mine) went to get REAL breakfast at Urth Coffee on Beverly Dr. in Beverly Hills, down the street from our job) We enjoyed some fresh scones and loves organic lattes. (Mine, pictured on the right) We parted ways for a few hours, so I went to Coffee Bean across from the Beverly Center and found a cute little nail place called Tina's Nails. I killed a few hours then met Morgan once again, this time at the Beverly Center. We walked around and killed some time chattin' talking, laughing and "window-shopping" as we're both poor at the moment. LOL. We once again parted ways later so I found an awesome place in LA called "The Grove." It's an outdoor mall with tons of high-end shops, restaurants and even a movie theater. :) It was fun walking around and enjoying some nice alone time. I spent about 45 minutes there until I sadly had to get to Beverly Hills to work this evening dinner shift.

I got to work at 5:30 pm, and at this point was already exhausted from a LONG day. I was a bit discouraged when I saw the section I was in but knew I'd make the most of it. About 20 minutes into my shift, I got a table and another and another. I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off for a while and was obviously mentally rained at this point and on my second wind apparently. LOL. And here's where the night got a tad bit interesting...

I had a few people at one of my tables and they happened to be extremely relaxed and eager to know about the restaurant. After being a "tour guide" and showing them around our extensive menu, a few more people joined the fun gathering. They were all so sweet and genuine, felt like I had know them for years. They eventually ordered tons of cocktails and wine, "Teasers", Entrées and eventually Dessert. At one point as I'm closing out most of my other tables, they as me for a favor. They figured since I was a tad bit younger then they were, (in their 50-60's) they as if I could help them get on the internet browser on one of the ladies' phone. I tried but failed. Nothing seemed to happen. So after a few more check backs, we chatted for a bit about what they were looking for so I offered my help. They were looking for an actor's house that they knew personally I suppose. I didn't know who they were talking about as it was clearly over my head. Hmmmm...

A little while later, they complimented me over and over again about how great my personality was, the outstanding service they had received from me, and how I was a "Superstar". They were super nice and sweet and my reply was "Everyone in the restaurant is a superstar as almost everyone is involved in the entertainment business, i.e. Actor, Dancer, Singer..." One gentleman asked what I did so I told him my story of Acting. He asked if I was from here and I said yes. Another gentleman on my left said to me, "Then you might want to shake this man's hand" pointing to a gentleman at the table across from him. I jokingly asked, "And why is that?" The gentleman we were talking about said that he owned "Zephyr Theatre on Melrose in Los Angeles" and he was a director and producer. Long story short, I felt REALLY blessed to even be able to chat and "make friends" with someone of his caliber. He handed me his business card and told me to send him my resume and headshot! WOW!!! This could be HUGE!! I thanked him and walked away, thanking God every step of the way for this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity!


They eventually got up and left, as a said goodbye to each one of them once again, but then to my surprise, one of the ladies turns to me and says, "today may be your lucky day!" I immediately thanked her and agreed! So now I have this amazing contact, just have to figure out a time to contact him.. Hmmmm... All I have to say is God is good!! =)

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A day at the movies...




















Today was a pretty relaxing and yet reflecting day! Day off from work today, so my Dad and I decided to go see "Toy Story 3." It was by far, the best one of the three. Really made me want to go find my old toys from my childhood and play with them all over again. Hats off to the dynamic due, Disney & Pixar once again! =)


Here's a review I read that compared a lot of the similarities in Toy Story 3 to Christianity:
(**Warning** Don't read unless you have already watched Toy Story 3)

SPOILER ALERT, don’t read any more if you have not seen the movie! Totally agree on the biblical theme. I am no expert on the bible but this is what I gathered after the second time I saw the film; it became very clear. They toys were running from their owner toward Lotso. He deceived them into thinking they were going to be happy in hell, then locked them in so they could not escape. During the toys’ ride toward death, when Lotso refused to push the button to save them from death, he said “Where’s your kid now?” just as Jesus was taunted during his march toward crucifixion. Additionally, the toys were supposed to go to the “attic” (heaven), and await a new life of play with Andy’s children. Also, Lotso tells the toys that they don’t need an owner, that “they own themselves,” that is, OK to be godless.
On the other side of things, spend the night by myself, with a nice glass of wine, a brand new book, "Pray Eat Love" and an old DVD.. "Sex and the City." (The first one)
I think in reflecting on the second movie of the evening, (Sex and the City) just made me realize how funny life can be sometime; Never stops, keeps on going weather you're ready for it or not. Life has some great times, like celebrations, girls night out, shopping, cocktails and weddings and not so great moments; heartbreak, confusion, anger, worry, and plain ol' sadness. But I guess there are times when you never think you'll laugh again (like Carrie) cause life sure knows how to throw some curve balls at you, but in the end, you know that life will go on and one day (weather next week or next year) the sun WILL shine again. Made me think a lot about my life and what a crazy year this has been for me but especially on how I've managed to survive!

So after a nice, quiet evening by myself, a few movies, a nice chat with a stranger from Australia and true happiness, here's to the start of Summer 2010 and a brand new life just waiting for me! =)

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Angels In Human Form...

***Technically this incident happened on Thursday, June 17, 2010***

It was a normal day, (like any other work day) and did what I do best; Take an hour to get ready! Haha! So I left my house, and to my surprise (as I literally jumped while opening the front door) there was a beautiful Hummingbird at the front door RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! I was quite startled and kinda mesmerized as it was just hanging out smelling and taking the nectar from a few of the flowers in the front yard. I thought to myself, "Lord, I know You're there and watching over me and I praise Your name for that!" As I continue to think about this precious little hummingbird, I again think to myself, "Father, as I look in utter amazement at this beautiful little creature that you have made, I can't help but to think that You also made me, with the same beauty and magnificence! I am so humbled by Your grace and mercy that You have on us and that You gave us the opportunity of 'Free Will' just as You did to this precious Hummingbird. And like the Hummingbird, we may fly closer to you or further away, and yet You still have an Agape love towards us."
As the morning went on, I happened to get to work 45 minutes early so I parked and changed for my work day. I planned on going to Whole Foods to look around but as we know, things don't always go as planned..Thank you for that Lord! I ended up parking on the street and saw an older African American man walk right past me while giving me a nice greeting, "Hello young lady!" as he passed me. I of course said Hello back and he asked how I was doing.. I told him I was great and getting ready for work and he responded by saying, "Thank God for that!" I agreed as always, giving thanks to my precious Lord. For the next few minutes we chatted and I found out he was indeed homeless, doing a little bit of everything to made money (i.e. washing car windshields, mowing lawns, shining shoes, ect.) It honestly broke my heart that my new friend, "Ruben" had been doing anything he could just to live..It reminded me of Matthew 6:26...

"Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" -Matthew 6:26 NIV


It also coincidentally reminded me of of of my favorite songs by Carrie Underwood, "Change." The opening verse and chorus of the song go like this...


"What'cha gonna do with the 36 cents Sticky with Coke on your floorboard When a woman on the street is huddle in the cold On a sidewalk vent trying to keep warm Do you call her over hand her the change Ask her a story ask her her name Or do you tell yourself You're just a fool Just a fool To believe you can change the world You're just a fool Just a fool To believe you can change the world"

After a few minutes of chatting with Ruben, he eventually asked me for money (which I knew he would do) but since my heart went out to him, I knew I had to. I offered to buy him food at first but he said he had ate last night so he was held over for now.He said he just wanted a few bucks to get a hotel room downtown for a shower and to rest. I didn't have any change so I went to Baskin Robbins and got some change for him. He thanked me quite a few times and even said "You are the kind of people that make the world go round. You were sent by God and are an angel!" It made me feel good to help someone like that. :) We finally parted ways and I went back to my car and when I turned back around to say bye, he was GONE!! Hmmm...Once again, this reminded me of a bible scripture I once heard about God testing us. Here it is...

"Be not forgetful to entertain strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares." -Hebrews 13:2
So...basically, I know that God puts us in situations and spots for a reason. Maybe Ruben was an Angel sent by God to test me and see where my heart was, maybe not. I guess I will never know this side of Heaven but I will never forget this honest, humble man I met on the streets of Beverly Hills. :)
I dedicate this blog posting to you Ruben..where ever you may be! Blessings!

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